Pie Is Better Than Cake

And it is better than every food, and better than basically every thing.

Illustration by the author.

I’m searching my mind to think of the first time I made a pie. I don’t think this was it, but I do recall this time my grandma came to visit — I must have been, like, 14, because I wasn’t vegan yet — and I put together an apple pie using a crust from the store. It wasn’t pie dough that you could roll…