You Can Write and Exercise At The Same Time

And it is awesome and fun.

Illustration by the author.

I am writing this on a treadmill.

I’ve really gone back and forth about whether this makes me the worst person at the gym or the coolest person at the gym — I’m walking quickly on this treadmill with a huge green plastic word processor in front of me, and some superlative absolutely applies. I decided to go with it, ultimately, because I felt that typing at the gym (1) isn’t technically against the rules; (2) is absolutely not hurting anyone; and (3) would probably make a good story for someone stopping by the High Ridge YMCA on a whim.

“Wife Jenny, guess what I saw the gym today, you’ll never guess.”

“Wife Kate, give me a chance to guess, please. Don’t assume I will never guess.”

“You’re right. Go ahead and guess.”

“Was it a person with a dog or a ferret?”

“No.”

“A baby on a treadmill?”

“No no no; it was some hipster trash glasses-wearing tattoo-having chick who was TYPING on WHAT APPEARED TO BE A TYPEWRITER FROM THE NINETIES while she was ON. THE. TREADMILL.”

“You should have let me keep guessing! That was my next guess!”